Never For Her
by SoUtHeRnBeLLe706
Summary: AU Season 7 Set after LMPTM. Spike falls for yet another Summers woman. Will get very dark in later chapters. More details inside... CHAPTER 17 UP!
1. Prologue

**Set** after Lies My Parents Told Me and goes AU from there and takes a darker turn. Also, I changed some of the backgound to fit my story, you will noice the changes as you read. The church scene never happened in 'Beneath You', but Buffy did learn of Spike's soul through one of his crazy ramblings in the basement. Also, Dawn has just recently turned eighteen. By the way, Buffy still thinks Spike is hopelessly in love with her.

**Disclaimer: I own nothing...unfortunatly. :(**

**Prologue:**

It wasn't supposed to be this way. I hadn't _wanted _to hurt her that night in the bathroom. It was all her fault, really it was. Had it not been for her bloody mixed signals, it never would have happened. It was always no at first, and not very long after that, she was beating me senseless and shaggin' me into oblivion.

She was using me, to make herself _feel_, I knew that, of course, hell she even admitted it. She had told me that she believed it was real..._for me_. Her on the other hand felt nothing in return. The damn bitch. But when she saw me and the demon girl getting' it on, it hurt her. Or she was jealous. Either way, I obviously did mean somethin' to her. Right? So I had to show her again, make her feel it. My love for her, that is.

How the bloody hell was I supposed to know that this was the _one _time that no actually meant no? And with a whole bottle of bourbon in me, well, I didn't catch on right away. But when I finally sobered up and realized what the hell I was doin', I stopped myself. I was horrified and disgusted with myself. I almost did what I had always detested _anyone _doing that to _any _woman. It was wrong, and I knew that.

If I had never gotten this sodding chip in my head, none of this would ever had happened. I would have been able to give that Slayer exactly what she deserved to begin with. And she never would have had a chance to turn me into the pathetic ponce I am now.

So when I left her house, I planned on doing just that.

Only, it didn't exactly go according to plan. I should have known. None of my plans ever actually go to way I like.

So, here I am, stuck with this sodding, miserable soul, all because I hadn't been in the right frame of mind when I told that demon shaman what I wanted. And the worst part of it...not even a good shag could shake it loose. And I hate that bitch of a slayer even more now that I ever had before. Besides the guilt of over a hundred and twenty years of killing, the only other thing this newfound soul has taught me, is that I was never _truly _in love with the Slayer at all. Bloody fabulous! Oh, and on top of that, I still have the soddin' chip!

So why the hell am I back here in Sunnyhell, helpin' out the Slayer, of all things? I have no bloody clue. Especially, when nobody wants me here. The Nibblet even threatened to set me on fire if I came near her sister again.

Didn't know the Bit had it in her to be so damn scary. Proud of her for that, I am. Always did love the Nibblet, not in the way I _thought_ I loved her sister, but still loved her, nonetheless. Her and their mum were only ones I truly cared for, always treated me like a man, never like a _thing._ I think maybe that's why I'm back here, to make sure the Little Bit is looked after properly...only, she ain't so little anymore, is she? When did this happen? Apparently, when I was screwin' her sister.

How the bloody hell did I not notice her, before? Bloody gorgeous, she is. With her long dark hair, big, beautiful, brilliant blue eyes, and legs that go on for days. _What the hell am I thinkin'? She's my Nibblet! _Besides, she hates me now, anyway. Not that I blame her, she has every right to hate me.

_But, damn, how she's changed..._

**_A/N: What do you think? Should I continue?_**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1:**

Spike had been watching Dawn a lot lately. She hadn't noticed, of course, he didn't make a show of it, but every time she left the room to be by herself, he followed, always staying just out of sight. He often caught her sitting on the roof outside her bedroom, smoking. _Since when does the Bit smoke?_

He also, noticed that the majority of the time when she left the room, it was usually when Buffy entered, and she never had a conversation with her, unless Buffy was the one to initiate it. And even then, she didn't say much. Not that she was really given a chance to, for the most part, the slayer ignored her unless she needed something, usually something like language translating or some other rot. The Bit was surprisingly good with that sort of thing. Well, it shouldn't be that surprising, she always was exceedingly bright.

He could easily see that they weren't close. They never really were, the slayer tended to close herself off from the people she loved, but this was different. This time it was Dawn doing the closing off. It seemed as though she could barely stand being around her sister anymore.

*~*~*

Spike stood in the shadows as he watched Dawn listen silently as Buffy laid into Giles about the plan he and Principal Wood had come up with to kill Spike. He could smell the rage coming off of her in waves. That made him smile. Maybe she did still care for him just a little bit, after all.

Dawn had waited until everyone was in bed asleep, before she snuck out of the house. Spike had followed her, making sure that nothing would get to her and harm her, a_ bit like old times, _he thought to himself, amused. He was careful to make sure he didn't alert her to his presence. And when she had made her way to Wood's _sanctuary, _he was more than a little curious to find out what she intended to do.

Surprisingly, he was still in the same spot Spike had left him earlier, still slumped over against the wall, bleeding everywhere. He looked dead and Dawn wasn't sure if he was even still alive, so she kicked him in the side..._hard_. When he grunted in pain and jerked slightly, she reared her fist back and punched him square in the face and his entire head snapped back from the force of her blow. Spike chuckled to himself, _The girl's got a nice right hook, I taught her that._

"You tried to kill Spike tonight." she stated, clearly pissed off.

"He deserved it." Wood spat out at her.

Dawn slapped him again, "What did he ever do to you?" she asked.

Spike ducked his head a bit, _Ahh, so the Bit didn't know the whole story, no wonder she was so quick to defend him. _He was sure she was going turn and leave once she got the details.

Wood clenched his jaw, "He killed my mother." he said evenly.

Dawn's eyes widened slightly, she had know his mother was a slayer, but she never knew that Spike had killed her. "Well, she was a slayer and he's a vampire, what did you think would happen? That they would play a friendly game of checkers?" she asked sarcastically. "If it hadn't been him, then it would have been some other vamp or demon. It doesn't matter either way, that was a long time ago and it doesn't give you the right to try and kill him, and he should have killed you for even trying...looks like he nearly did." she said through gritted teeth. Dawn bent over to pick up a silver handled knife that had been lying on the floor, "Maybe I should do it, that way you don't have another chance to try and finish what you started. What do you think?" she asked as she glided the blade along his throat.

Spike couldn't believe that she was still taking up for him. He moved closer to the door to get a better look, but still kept himself unnoticed. He was intrigued, he had never seen Dawn like this before. She looked dangerous, _dangerous and beautiful,_ and he couldn't tell if she was bluffing or not.

"You wouldn't." he said confidently.

Dawn cocked her head and raised an eyebrow, looking very much like Spike did sometimes, "Wouldn't I?" she asked as stilled the knife on his adam's apple.

Wood looked scared now, "What would Buffy think?" he chocked out.

This angered Dawn even more and she pressed the blade against his skin hard enough to draw blood, "YOU HONESTLY THINK I CARE WHAT THAT BITCH THINKS? HUH? SHE GETS EVERYTHING, TAKES EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME, EVEN THE THINGS SHE DOESN'T EVEN WANT! AND YOU ALMOST DID THE SAME!" she screamed at him, "Besides, she would never know." she said coldly as she readied herself to slit his throat.

_Damn, she's serious, she's really gonna do it. She's actually gonna kill the bastard. But he couldn't let her, he didn't want her carrying around that kind of guilt the way he does, especially not for him. _

As the scent of Wood's blood began to get stronger, he gently grabbed her wrist to stopped her, making his presence know for the first time. "Don't luv, he's not worth it," he said softly, then whispered for only her to hear, "and neither am I."

_Dawn stared at him wide eyed, she hadn't known he was there. Shit, he must have heard everything...what I said about Buffy...and him. FUCK! What am I gonna do?_ "Spike. How long have you been here?" she asked not knowing what else to say and desperately hoping that he had only just arrived.

"A while. Come on, pet, let's go." he said to her, taking the knife out of her trembling hands and tossing it on the floor next to Wood. Once he was outside with Dawn, he told her to stay there, while he went back in.

He crouched down next to the principal and let his demon visage show, "This never happened, mate. She was never here. You got that?" he growled. Wood nodded the best he could, "Yeah, I got it." he choked out.

Dawn didn't say a word to Spike as they walked back to Revello Dr. She didn't even look back at him as she went up to her room.

**AN: Here is chapter 1...should I still continue??**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 2:**

Spike was disappointed that Dawn hadn't said a single word to him on their way home. He had wanted to talk to her about what happened tonight. What did she mean when she said _'She takes everything away from me, even the things she doesn't want and you almost did the same'_? He knew she was talking about him, of course, since that was the whole point in her going to _kill_ the principal. _I still can't believe she was actually going to kill him for me. _

Did she really think that the slayer took me away from her? We had gotten close during that summer that the slayer was gone. And after she came back, I stopped comin' around as much, and me and Dawn had barely even spoken to each other in the last year. I was the only person she talked to, who understood her, and I abandoned her just like everyone else in her life had. For her ungrateful, selfish, self-centered sister. _God, I'm such a bloody idiot! _

Spike had climbed up onto the roof near Dawn's room and settled himself in the shadows, where he usually stood at to watched her, and waited. And just like every other night, she came out to have a smoke, just like he expected. Only this time, he let her know he was there.

"Those things'll kill you." he said half serious, chuckling to himself when Dawn jumped back startled and would have fallen off the roof if he hadn't of been quick enough to catch her. Dawn only glared at him before looking straight ahead and taking a long drag. "I wanted to talk to you about what happened tonight." he said casually.

"I didn't do it for you!" she snapped.

Spike tilted his head to the side, "Right. I doubt you did it for that 'bitch' sister of yours. So why did you do it, then? Thought you wanted me dead, eh? I recall you threatenin' to set me on fire in my sleep." he said.

Dawn opened her mouth to say something, then closed it again before speaking, "I do. I would just rather it be me who does it and not him." she said unconvincingly, then changed the subject, "So I guess you're gonna tell Buffy about what I did, now that you're all soulful?"

Spike tightened his jaw, his soul was still a sore subject with him, "Now, why would I do somethin' like that, pet?" he asked her.

Dawn ignored the question, "Then if you're not going to tell her, why do you want to talk to me?" she asked harshly.

Spike studied her momentarily, "What's going on with you, luv?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." she said quietly.

Spike arched an eyebrow, "You know exactly what I'm talkin' about. You've changed, pet, this isn't you."

Dawn stood up and turned to face him, "Really? How the hell would you know? You don't even know me!" she spat at him.

Spike thought about what she had said. She was right, of course. He didn't know her. Not anymore. And that was his fault, he hadn't bothered to, not until now, that is. "Dawn, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have drifted apart from you like I did." he started.

"What, you mean the entire time you were off fucking my sister? Now that you're not anymore, you want to talk to me, hoping that maybe she'll notice and take you back?" she asked angrily.

"No. I assure you, that's not it. Nothing I do is for her anymore. I want to get to know you again. This time it's for you." Spike said honestly.

Dawn look at him in disbelief, "Right. Sure it is. You're still in love with her, that's why you went and got your soul. That's why you're here. For her." she stated bitterly.

Spike just laughed humorously, "Couldn't be more wrong on that one, luv." Then something clicked inside Spike brain, "You're jealous, aren't you?" he asked in wonder.

"What? No! Why would you think that?" Dawn quickly asked, her face turning bright red.

Spike smiled, "That's it, innit it? That's why you threatened me if I came near your sis again, not because you didn't want me to hurt her, but because you just didn't want me near her. That why you hate her so much?" he inquired.

Dawn didn't say anything, just shook her head. "She didn't want me but you did. That what you meant when you said that to poor Robyn?"

Tears filled Dawn's eyes as she stared off in the opposite direction. "Just go away, Spike." she whispered.

Spike reached out and caressed her face and made her look at him, "I'm not goin' anywhere, luv. Not as long as you're here."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Dawn questioned.

"It means just that. I'm not here because of the slayer. I'm here because of you. You're the only reason I stayed here." he said truthfully.

Dawn didn't know what to think. _Why would he be here for me? He hadn't even bothered to talk to me in almost a year. He's lying. He is here for Buffy. It's always about her._ "Liar." she said it so quietly he almost didn't hear her.

Spike took hold of her hand and placed a small kiss on the top of it, "I mean it, luv."

"Really? And what about Buffy? Where does she fit in?" she asked, still not convinced.

"She doesn't." he stated simply.

Dawn shook her head, still not understanding, "But you love her."

Spike moved closer to her and looked into her eyes, "No. I don't. Never really did. That night, when I almost...that night I realized that I didn't love her and never really had. I had a thing for her, not sure what it was, but it wasn't love. But it's over now. It was over that night. The only thing I feel for her when I see her is hate and absolute disgust. Both for her using me the way she did and for letting myself be used by her."

"But what about your soul? You got it for her. Why would you do that if you didn't love her?" Dawn asked puzzled.

Spike sighed, "Told you earlier, luv, you couldn't be more wrong."

Dawn furrowed her brow in confusion, "So, you lied? You don't have a soul?" she asked half wishing that he didn't, and that he had lied.

Spike laughed, "Wish it were that simple. Nope, it's here, pet, burnin' away at me, all the time." he started as he touched his chest, "I just didn't ask for it. What I told the shaman was to give me what she deserves, what I wanted was to get that soddin' chip outta my head. Go back to bein' me, the old me. But no, the bloke had other ideas. Now it's here, in me, all the time. I never wanted it to begin with, I bloody well hate it, and I hate _her_ even more." he finished with a growl.

**A/N: So what do you think?? Any good?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes: Some of the dialogue is borrowed from Empty Places.**

**Chapter 3:**

Spike and Dawn had ended up talking all night long, only when they noticed that it was starting to get light out, did they decide to get inside. Dawn was pretty tired as it was, so she was somewhat happy to be able to get in bed and go to sleep. _Somewhat._

She hadn't talked to Spike like this in what seemed like forever. Well, to be perfectly honest, they had never talked like that, before. Somehow, this had just seemed more intimate than any other time. But maybe it was just her.

Also, she had never heard Spike say a single bad word about Buffy, well, actually she had, but not like this. This time he truly meant it. He wasn't in love with her. He _hated _her. _Good. Serves her right._ Dawn loved her sister, she did, but also despised her. _If only she had stayed dead, then maybe I wouldn't hate her so much. Everything went to hell once she came back. _

Dawn's thoughts were interrupted when Spike bent down and kissed her lips gently, then left without another word. Dawn touched her lips with her fingertips. The kiss was quick and chaste, and she wasn't sure if it meant anything or not. _Probably not. Just a friendly kiss, between friends. That's it._ Dawn had always wanted to be more than just friends, but he never noticed and likely never would. The only thing he ever noticed was Buffy. _Only now, he doesn't want her anymore. _She smiled to herself as she got into her bed. _Maybe, just maybe, he will finally notice me._

*~*~*

A week had gone by since Dawn and Spike had talked on the roof. Faith had arrived and so had a lot of other girls, well, potential slayers. The house was packed. Dawn was already sharing her room with two of the girls. One who snores...loud, and another who never shuts up, while Buffy, on the other hand had her room all to herself. Dawn was starting to go just a little bit crazy.

She had been spending more and more time with Spike in the basement. Whenever he wasn't helping out with Buffy training the girls, he was usually staying out of the way, keeping to himself. With the exception of Dawn, of course, he seemed to enjoy her company.

*~*~*

"Spike, I have a mission for you." Giles told him.

"Oh, really? 'Cause, you know, sometimes our missions end up with you trying to kill me. I'm not fond of those." Spike said sarcastically.

"This is bona fide, with real ramifications. Take a look at this." Giles said as he showed him a photograph.

Spike studied the picture, "Looks like our boy's been here. You want me to go check it out?"

"I need someone who can take care of themselves in case Caleb is after some souvenirs."Spike looked at him in disbelief, still not sure if he was setting him up on a mission to not come back from again. Giles seemed to recognize this and added, "Take Andrew with you."

"What!?" Spike asked, clearly not likeing that idea, "And again I wonder if you intend for me to return alive." he said suspiciously.

Giles sighed, "Fine, then take Dawn. I assure you, this is indeed a real. Find out what you can."

*~*~*

"You sent Dawn with Spike?" Buffy asked Giles, feeling slightly jealous. She had noticed that Spike had been spending more time with Dawn than her lately. _In fact the only time he has been spending with me at all is when he is helping me out with the potentials, and even then he barely speaks to me. It almost seems as though he's avoiding me..._

Buffy, you weren't here. I expect both of them to return safely." Giles promised. Buffy nodded absently, still lost in her thoughts, _Maybe I should talk to him, see if everything is okay with him. I know he still feels guilty for what he did to me, but I just need to convince him that it's not his fault. He is different now. He has a soul. And he got it for me, because of what he did. He's a better man now. He'll feel better when I explain this to him. _Buffy smiled, "Where is everyone? Faith, the girls...where'd they go?" her smile immediately fading when she got the answer.

**A/N: Please review and tell me what you think. Also, constructive criticism and ideas are always welcome. I know this was a really short chapter but it was really just a filler.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 4:**

"Spike?" Dawn asked after several minutes of quietness. They had been sitting for nearly three hours already in the monastery, waiting for the sun to go down before they headed back home.

"Yeah, luv?" Spike looked over at her and asked.

"I'm scared." she admitted quietly.

Spike looked around, "Nothin' to be scared of, here, Bit. Got the Big Bad with you to protect you." he said trying to lighten her mood.

Dawn gave a short laugh, "No, I mean about what's gonna happen...with The First. It feels different this time. And I'm scared." she whispered, a tear slipping down her cheek.

Spike immediately pulled her close to comfort her, "You're right. It does feel different this time and I don't know what's gonna happen, but you don't need to be scared. I won't let anything happen to you, luv. I'll protect you." he assured her as he stroked her hair.

Dawn looked up at him with watery eyes, "Til' the end of the world?" she asked.

Spike smiled and gazed into her eyes, "Til' the end of the world." he promised, wiping the tears from her face.

At that moment, Dawn suddenly found the courage she always longed for, and reached her face up to his and pressed her lips against his.

Spike was taken a bit by surprise and didn't respond at first. She fully expected him to pull away after a few seconds, but to her surprise, instead of pulling away, he took the initiative to deepen the kiss. His tongue grazing along her lips asking permission to enter.

Dawn parted her lips to let him in and as soon as he was, she felt like her heart was going burst out of her chest, from the rapid pace it was beating at. _Oh my God...I can't believe he is actually kissing me back._

Spike pulled her onto his lap to where she was straddling him as he continued to kiss her.

Spike had known that he had been slowly falling for this girl..._woman_, since he had come back to Sunnydale, two months ago, but now, he knew that he was long past that point, he was totally and completely in love with her. _Bloody wonderful. What is it with me and Summers' women?_ He asked himself, but he knew that this was different, wasn't like before. He never wanted to hurt this one, like he did the other one. Even without the soul, he would never have done anything to cause her any sort of pain..._intentionally_.

Spike had moved his hands, one resting on the small of her back, while the other was tangled in her long, brown hair. Dawn was feeling his erection straining against the denim of his jeans and lightly pushing onto her own denim covered heat, and moaned softly. He moved his mouth to the column of her throat, licking and sucking gently as he put a hand on her hip and pressed her down onto him, rocking her back and forth. Meanwhile, his other hand traveled underneath her shirt to caress her stomach, slowly making its way upward to her breasts.

"Stop." Dawn breathed out heavily. Spike moved his mouth back up to hers and continued kissing her, but stilled his roaming hand and placed it back on her waist. Dawn pulled away slightly and pressed her hands against his chest, "Spike, stop." she said again, even as she was still grinding into him.

Spike looked at her, his eyes full of lust and just a hint of fear, "What's wrong, luv?" he questioned, praying that she wasn't going to shut down and tell him that this kiss meant nothing to her and it was just a mistake.

Dawn stopped moving. She looked up and let out a slightly frustrated sigh, "What are we doing?" she asked.

Spike cocked his head, "Well, I thought it was pretty obvious. I, for one, was enjoying making out with a gorgeous lil' brunette." he smirked going in for another kiss.

Dawn stopped him and shook her head, "I'm serious. What is this?" she asked again, meeting his eyes.

"What do you want it to be, pet?" he asked, as he brushed a strand of hair out of her face.

Dawn studied his face, trying to figure out what he was thinking, "I don't know." she lied. She knew full well what she wanted. She wanted him, wanted to be with him, love him, and to be loved by him. But she was to too afraid of being rejected to tell him. She was scared that if he knew exactly how she felt, then he would distance himself from her again, and she couldn't take that. She had only just gotten him back, and it was better to have at least part of him than none at all. Dawn shook her head as if to erase what she had asked, "Forget it. It doesn't matter right now." she said.

Spike sighed, he was hoping for her to say more than that. Maybe tell him she wanted more with him, that the kiss had meant something to her. He was lost in his thoughts when Dawn leant in and continued where they had left off. At that point, Spike threw all of his thoughts out the window and decided to just let it be and live in the moment..._for now_.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 5:**

The two were still heavily engrossed in one another, had been for quite some time now, so much so that she barely even noticed Spike changing their positions. He had moved her to where she was lying with her back on the ground and positioned himself on top of her.

Then, out of nowhere, he stopped, "Hold on a sec, luv." he said as he got off of her and slipped out of his duster and spread it out on the ground. _Don't want her layin' on the bare floor, it's bloody filthy,_ he thought. Then he gently lifted her and placed her on top of it, before he climbed back on her and quickly continued where he had left off.

"You know...it's a bloody good thing it's _you_ here and not Andrew, because I highly doubt that this would be happening with him." Spike said playfully.

Dawn giggled, "You never know...I think he has a crush on you." she teased, instantly cut off by Spike kissing her once again.

While Dawn was running her fingers up and down his biceps, he settled himself in between her legs. Dawn wrapped her legs tightly around his waist while he pushed his rock hard erection into her, creating more friction.

Spike moved his hands back under her blouse and pushed it up past her breasts, revealing a red, lacy bra that fitted her perfectly. He lowered his mouth over a fabric covered nipple and bit teasingly, eliciting a soft moan from Dawn.

He then, trailed his tongue down her torso, placing wet kisses every so often, and stopped just above her jeans. He shifted his eyes up to hers, making sure that she was alright. Her head was tilted back with her eyes shut, and her lips slightly parted. _So beautiful, so soft and perfect, _he marveled. He didn't want to push her into going further than she was comfortable with, but she showed no signs of wanting him to stop or slow down. He reached for the buttons on her jeans and slowly undid them and slid them down off her legs. And as he caught her matching thong with his teeth, and made a move the slide them off as well, Dawn jerked up to stop him, her heart beating wildly.

_Dawn wanted this, she wanted him more than anything, she didn't want him to stop. But she also wanted more than just the physical connection he was offering. She tried to imagine that this meant as much to him as it did to her, but she couldn't pretend any longer. As much as she wanted to, she couldn't go through with it. She wanted her first time to be perfect, and it could never be if the man she was in love with and ready to give herself to, didn't feel the same. She couldn't do that to herself, no matter how tempting._

"Spike, I'm sorry...I just can't do this." she panted out as she scooted back toward the wall, still sitting on his duster, and brought her knees up to her chest. Dawn shook her head, "I'm sorry, I totally just led you on. I didn't mean to, but I..." she started out, just to be cut off by Spike.

Spike moved closer to her and tilted her chin up to make her look at him, "Dawn, listen to me. It's okay. Don't apologize. You have nothin' to be sorry 'bout, luv. I understand if your not ready, and I respect that. And, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I would never push you into anything, pet, I promise." he assured her.

_God...he is so amazing...that just makes it even harder, she thought. "No, you didn't. It's not that...it's just...(sigh)...I've never done......before, and I don't want my first time to mean nothing and to be a mistake." she explained._

_Spike's lips straightened out to a thin line, and his jaw was set. "Right. Means nothing..." he trailed off sourly. So that's how it is. I mean nothing to her. But at least she has the decency not to shag me anyway. Points for her on that one. Will I never be good enough...honestly? Stupid, bloody women!_

Dawn could see the anger burning in his eyes, _he was so understand just a minute ago...what did I say? _"Spike, I'm sorry. But I have to be honest with you..."

Spike looked at her icily, "A'right. Go ahead...be honest. Tell me how I'm a disgusting _thing_, and you could never lower yourself to being with me...that I'm _beneath you_." he practically yelled.

Dawn looked at him in shock, "What?" she choked out, shaking her head, "Spike, that's...that's not what I was going to say..." she tried.

Spike inched closer to her, now only inches from her face, "Really? Then what was it you were you gonna say? Huh? Go on, then...let's hear it." he spoke, his voice cold and quiet.

Dawn had never seen him like this with her before, and to tell the truth she was a little frightened. She knew he wasn't going to physically harm her, but it still unnerved her. "I, umm...uh..." she began as a tear slipped down her cheek.

"Come on, luv. Spit it out. You what?" he said through clenched teeth.

She swallowed the lump forming in her throat and tried to blink away her tears, only causing more to fall, "I...nevermind." she mumbled quietly, then tried to move away from him.

Spike grabbed her by her shoulders, firmly holding her in place, but making sure not to hurt her, "Nuh uh, I want to hear what you have to say." he growled.

Dawn was starting to tremble, "You're scaring me." she said shakily, more tears starting to flow.

This seemed to penetrate through the fog that was Spike's brain, and he immediately let go of her. _Christ, what is wrong with me? I'm scaring her bloody senseless, she's shaking. _Spike softened his expression, "I'm not gonna hurt you, pet. Would never hurt you. Just want to know what you were gonna say." he promised calmly.

Dawn looked down, "I was going to say that...(_deep breath_)...that I wanted more, more than what you are able to give me. I don't want this to only be one-sided...that's why I couldn't let myself...I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you mad." she explained, not daring to meet his eyes. Too ashamed to see the rejection she knew was coming, in his eyes. So, she closed her eyes, bracing herself, and waited.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 6:**

_What? What had she just said? Surely, I heard her wrong. God, I'm such an idiot! Scared the Bit half to death, all because she wanted the same thing I want. How could I be so bloody stupid? Does she really think I dont want her? _"Well, that's not what I expected to hear." he said, still taken aback. When he saw the hurt look on her, he clarified, "Not that that's not what I wanted to hear, jus' wasn't expectin' it, that's all."

"I know." she muttered quietly, still not not looking at him directly.

Spike studied her, trying to figure out just what exactly was going on in her mind, _What does she want? I know there are things I am not able to give, seein' as I'm a vampire, but I'll do my best. _"How do you know that? How do you know that it's more than I'm able to give you?" he asked. He reached out and turned her face to meet his, "What _do_ you want? I'll give you everything I can, but you have to tell me what it is that you want, pet."

Dawn stayed silent for a moment, trying to get the courage to ask him the one question that meant everything, and honestly, she wasn't really sure if she truly wanted to know his answer. "Could you ever love me?" she asked, finally locking her eyes with his. _There. It's out there now, and I can't take it back. What if he says no? What if he-_

_That's it? She just wants me to be able to love her? That was easy. _"I do love you, Dawn." he stated. _That really what she thought I couldn't give her?_

Dawn smiled sadly, "No, I mean _really_ love me. Like the way you loved _Buffy_." she admitted bitterly, her sister's name rolling off her tongue like acid.

Spike took an unnecessary breath, "I could never love you like I loved your sister, on account of the fact that I never loved her at all. But, if your askin' if I could ever be _in_ love with you, then the answer is yes. It's already happened, pet. I love you. I'm in love with you." he declared.

Dawn stared at him wide-eyed. "Do you mean that? A-are you sure?" she asked, praying that he did and wasn't going to take it back.

Spike grinned, " 'Course, I'm sure. Love you more than anything, pet."

Dawn smiled and crawled onto his lap, still clad in only her t-shirt and a g-string, that shows off more than it actually covers. Dawn sat, staring him in the eyes for a moment, looking as if she was trying to decide something, then came to a decision. She reached for the hem of her shirt, slowly raising it, when Spike stilled her hands, pulling her shirt back down. "What are you doing, luv?" he asked, with a curious expression.

Dawn's entire body tensed and she started to lift herself off of him, humiliated. _I thought it was obvious what I was doing...thought he wanted me to. Does he not want me now? Am I taking everything the wrong way? _

Spike pushed her back down onto him, "I didn't say get off me, luv, I just asked what you were doing." he told her, sensing her embarrassment.

She was now fidgeting with her hands, "I just... I umm, I thought that's what you wanted." she answered nervously.

Spike tilted his head to the side, _Is she offerin' to give herself to me, right now? Just to make me happy? 'Cause she thinks that's what I want from her? _"No, pet. I don't want you to do something you don't want to do. I can wait, luv, I can wait as long as I have to, until you're sure, 'til you're ready." he explained.

Dawn shook her head side to side, "It's okay. I'm ready. I want to...that is if you want to." she assured him.

Spike raised his eyebrow, "Oh, I want to. No denyin' that." he smirked as he took her hand and placed it on the bulge in his pants, laughing when he heard Dawn's heart speed up and her face turn beet red, "But, not now...not here. Your first time should be special, not on the ground in some dirty, dusty, old abandoned building. You deserve better." he told her seriously.

_Wow. He's turning down sex because he thinks I deserve better. This man...vampire...whatever, is amazing. How the hell could Buffy not see that? Well, lucky for me that she didn't. _"If it's with you, it would be special. Doesn't matter where." she said honestly.

_How did I ever convince myself that I was in love with the slayer, when this gorgeous and amazing woman was right in front of my bloody face the whole time? _he wondered. Spike was still awe-struck when Dawn spoke again, "But if you want to wait, I can do that, too." she said with a gleam in her eye, as she stood up and turned around, giving him a full view of her backside and heard Spike growl loudly when she bent over to retrieve her jeans.

*~*~*

Several minutes later, when she was fully dressed, she sat beside Spike, leaning against the wall, resting her head on his shoulder.

Dawn seemed lost in thought, "What's on your mind, pet?" Spike asked curiously.

Dawn hesitated before answering, "You remember that night you found me with Principal Wood?" she asked slowly.

Spike thought back, remembering how hurt and angry Dawn had been when she found out what he had tried to do, remembered that she almost killed the wanker for it. "Yeah...I remember."

She bit her lip before continuing, "I would have killed him, you know. If you hadn't of shown up and stopped me, I would have killed him." Dawn admitted.

Spike turned his head to face her, "I know." he said. _He knew that this should have disturbed him, especially now that he has a soul, but it didn't. Of course, he never wanted her to carry something like that on her conscious, but the fact that she would have, for him, made him love her even more._

Dawn studied his face momentarily, before saying, "You know what else? You were wrong that night." she stated. At his questioning look, she continued, "You said that you weren't worth it...but you are. You always have been...to me, at least, even without your soul."

Spike was touched beyond words. Never in his life had someone said anything as meaningful as this about him. No one before, had ever made him feel like he mattered. He had no idea what to say to that. She had always treated him like a man, never less. She knew he was a vampire, knew he had killed hundreds upon hundreds of innocent people, and never had any remorse..._until now_, but it never made a difference to how she treated him. She didn't see him for what he was, but rather who he was.

Spike put his arm around her slender frame and drew her closer, placing a kiss on top of her head, "You have no idea, just how much that means to me. I would never have let you go through with it, but the fact that you would, means more to me than you will ever know."

**AN: ok, i hope ya'll like...i just hope that ya'll didn't think it was too ooc or too fluffy, i might of gone a bit overboard...sorry if i did. please review and tell me what you thought. thanks to everyone who reads and enjoys.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 7:**

It was fifteen minutes past nine when the two arrived back at the Summers' home. Everyone was gathered inside for some kind of meeting. Neither Spike or Dawn wanted to go in, but knew that they had to eventually. Better to be in there and listen up, that way someone doesn't have to go over it all over again.

But, before Dawn could open the door, Spike had grabbed her and pulled her close, kissing her passionately, before letting her go and nuzzling her ear, "Love you, kitten." he murmured.

Dawn smiled blissfully. She felt like her knees were about to give out. _I don't think I will ever get used to this...but I could definitely try! _Spike opened the door to the house, and ushered her inside.

*~*~*

When the door closed behind him, Robyn Wood stepped out of the shadows, glaring heavily. _So the younger one is screwing the vampire, now. I should have known it when she tried to kill me. She's a filthy whore, just like her sister. That girl needs to be taught a lesson. _Wood thought, an evil grin playing on his lips.

*~*~*

As soon as they entered the house, Buffy came running up hugging Spike, "Oh thank God, you're back safe."

Spike just stood there, not even bothering to hug her back. After an exceedingly long couple of seconds he put his hands on her shoulders and lightly backed her up, "Very touching, Slayer, but I would think that you would be just a little more concerned with the well being of your sister, instead of with a vampire." he said glancing over to Dawn.

Dawn glared at her sister, feeling slightly jealous of her even touching Spike, but comforted that he didn't seem to like it, _My, God...needy much? By the way...I'm here too and don't worry about me, I'm fine! _

Buffy at least had the decency to look guilty, "I'm sorry, Dawn. Of course I was worried about you too, but I could see that you were fine, and then I saw him and I just..." she stammered.

"It's fine. I'm fine, he's fine. It's all good." Dawn intervened, hoping that she would just drop it. It was always a nice reminder that the _vampire_ who she supposedly hated before, meant more to her than her own sister.

Buffy smiled guiltily, "Ok, well actually you both are back in time for the meeting." she said turning and heading back to the living room, barely registering that the entire room had just witnessed the embarrassing scene.

*~*~*

"If you don't fall in line, then we won't stand a chance against The First. We have to be together on this. Look, I'm still in charge here." Buffy said angrily.

Rona cut in, "And why is that exactly?"

"Because I'm the Slayer."

"And isn't Faith a Slayer, too?"

"Yes, but I'm the _real _slayer. Guys, it doesn't matter...I know I'm right about this." she insisted.

…

"I've gotten us this far."

"But, not without a price. I'm tryin' to see your point here, Buff. But it must be a little to my left, because I just don't." Xander said ruefully.

Everyone in the room had turned on her, the only person who hadn't was, "Spike? You know I'm right, don't you?" Buffy asked desperately.

Spike's head popped up, "What? Don't bloody well look at me. I, actually happen to agree with everyone here. You're not thinkin' clearly, which just might end up getting' all these girls killed. Probably will." he said matter of factly.

Buffy looked deeply hurt and humiliated, she never thought that Spike would turn on her, too. _He was the one person who I could always count on. He had my back, no matter what. Even if he thought I was wrong, he would never say it in front of others. _Buffy looked around the room. Everyone was glaring at her. _How dare they question my leadership. Whatever...they will get what's coming to them. _

"Fine. You guys want Faith as your leader? You got her. But when she leads all of us into disaster, remember, that's your own fault." She stalked out of the room and headed upstairs to her own bedroom.

*~*~*

Later that night, Buffy came down into the basement to talk with Spike. She found him sitting on his cot, with his back against the wall, and a thin sheet barely covering his obviously nude body. When Spike saw her, he immediately pulled the sheet up to cover his lower half a little more.

"Relax, nothing I haven't seen before...or done everything else to." she joked.

Spike just raised a scarred eyebrow, he was apparently not amused. "What do you want, Slayer?"

She stopped smiling, now. "Well...I just wanted to talk. It hurt that you didn't have my back, earlier, but it's okay. I forgive you."

_Who the hell does this bloody bitch think she is? She forgives me? Oh, that's rich. _"That so?"

"Yeah. But I also wanted to see if everything is okay with you. You seem distant, and you barely even talk to me anymore. Are you mad at me?" she asked confused.

Spike snorted, "No. Not _mad _at you." _Just can't bloody stand you._

Buffy looked skeptical, "You sure?" at his nod, she continued, "I cannot believe that I let Faith be in charge. Every time she comes here it is to take everything away from me." she ranted, "I bet it pisses her off that she can't have you too." she said softly moving closer to him.

"Come again?" he asked perplexed, but she was done talking. She lifted her face up to his to kiss him. Spike moved backwards, "What the bloody hell are you doing?"

Buffy smiled, "What does it look like I'm doing?" she asked climbing on top of him.

Spike took a deep calming breath, "Looks like you're in need of some cold comfort, and I'm just the vamp to give it to you."

She leant into his ear, "Looks like..." she whispered in what she thought was a seductive manner.

"Get off." he said coldly.

"That's the intention." she laughed.

Spike vamped out and growled, "I mean it, Slayer. Get the bloody hell off of me!" he shouted, then tossed her to the side.

Buffy stared in shock, she felt like she had just been physically slapped, "Spike? What's wrong?"

_The stupid bint really doesn't get it, does she? _Spike let his human features return, "What's wrong? I'm not your sodding sex slave. Find someone else to use to make yourself feel better. It's not gonna be me this time."

"Spike, that's not what this was about. I just wanted to be with you tonight." for once she was actually being honest with him.

Spike shrugged, "Too bad, Slayer. Really rather be by myself, if ya don't mind." he said with a fake smile. _Christ, take a hint and just leave, already._

Buffy nodded, "Ok, sorry. I'll go. You know where to find me, if you change your mind." she said on the brink of tears as she left.

*~*~*

Buffy didn't let the tears fall until after she had gotten out of the basement, not seeing Dawn standing in the darkness in the kitchen.

Dawn waited until she heard Buffy shut the door to her room, before going in to see Spike.

"Bloody hell! Can't you take a soddin' hint?" Spike hollered as Dawn entered.

Dawn jumped in surprise, "Sorry, I'll leave."

Spike shot his head in her direction, "Sorry, luv, didn't realize it was you. Come on in."


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 8:**

"Bloody hell! Can't you take a soddin' hint?" Spike hollered as Dawn entered.

Dawn jumped in surprise, "Sorry, I'll leave."

Spike shot his head up in her direction, "Sorry, luv, didn't realize it was you. Come on in."

Dawn smiled, "You sure? Kinda sounded like you would rather be alone." she raised a questioning eyebrow, with a knowing grin on her face.

_So, she was listenin', was she? _Spike smirked, "Just from certain people. You, ...I don't mind one bit." he said motioning her to come down the stairs.

Spike took in her damp hair, she was dressed in a tiny pair of tight, yellow shorts and a thin, white spaghetti strap...with no bra, _Wonder if she realizes you can see right through that bloody thing._ Spike curled his tongue behind his teeth, looking her over, "Looks like you're all ready for bed."

Dawn blushed slightly under his lust filled gaze, "Yeah...I was just wondering if I could lay down with you for a little bit?" she asked hopefully.

"Lay as long as you like, pet." Spike laid down on his side facing her, and lifted the sheet up for her to climb in, exposing his naked self to her in the process.

Dawn's eyes grew wide and she tried very hard to look anywhere but at his manly parts, "Oh, umm, okay...sure." but she didn't move. _Oh, my gosh...wow... I have never seen a naked man before...and Spike...oh, wow...he's...big...really, really big. _

Spike could hear her heart hammering in her chest, as her face turned redder than he's ever seen, and grinned, "I could put some pants on if it bothers you, luv." he said as he started to get up.

Dawn snapped out of her daze, "No, it's okay. I don't mind. If it doesn't bother you, then it doesn't bother me." she answered, still not making a move toward the cot.

Spike arched an eyebrow, "Now, why would it bother me, pet?" he asked amused, pulling her to him. He could feel how tense she was in his arms, "You sure you don't mind?" he asked again.

She looked into his face, "I'm sure." she answered shakily.

"Then relax, luv. I'm not gonna bite you..._well, not unless you want me to_." he joked, vamping out, growling playfully, and nipping at her neck. She squirmed and laughed, then finally relaxed into his embrace as his face returned to normal.

"So...what was that all about? Buffy kinda ran out of here in tears." She had actually heard the last bit of their conversation. She wasn't eavesdropping, _per se_, more like listening while waiting for Buffy to leave.

Spike rolled his eyes, "Just made it clear to the bint that I wasn't gonna be her soddin' sex slave anymore."

"So, you meant it? You really don't want her anymore?" Dawn asked unsure. He'd said that he didn't, he even said that he loved her, but Dawn was still worried that some part of him would always want Buffy.

"Not a bit. Was out of my mind to think I wanted her in the first place." Spike shook his head in wonder, then looked over at Dawn. He could see that she wasn't quite convinced, "I told you, Bit, I love you. I'm with you now. You're the one I want." he said solemnly.

This seemed to make her even more uncertain, "Why? Why me?" She wanted to believe him, but it just seemed so surreal. Why would he want me? He could have anyone, even _her_, now that he has a soul. Why would he choose me?

Spike tilted his head and studied her, "Why not you?" _Doesn't she know how incredibly spectacular she is?_

Dawn sighed, "I don't know, I just don't want you to only want me because I remind you of her somehow." _I was made from her...maybe that's the why he wants me...what if I'm just the closest thing to her he has._

Spike looked at her for a moment before laughing, "You're insane if you think you remind me of her. You are nothing like her, you're as different as night and day."

Dawn wasn't sure if she should be relieved or insulted. She wanted to be nothing like her sister, but she wasn't sure if Spike saw that as a good thing or a bad. "How?" she asked.

Spike scoffed, "What, you want a list?" Dawn shrugged, then looked at him, arching her brow, expecting an answer. "A'right, then, skipping past the obvious differences, including the fact that she has absolutely no sense of fun, whatsoever. For one, You don't give a damn about what anyone thinks_, _while, _she..._cares way too bloody much. Another thing, she tends keep her emotions buried, doesn't say how she feels. You on the other hand, never hold them back...you say exactly what you feel. Also, she sees the world in black and white, you don't. You have always seen the shades of grey. In fact, you yourself are one of those shades of grey, just like me. She could never accept me before, because I didn't have a soul, but you always have, doesn't matter what I have done, you never cared about any of that. You understand me. She could never. You know what I am, and it doesn't make a soddin' difference to you, which is one of the reasons I love you so bloody much."

_Ok, so apparently he sees it as a good thing._ "Wow, that's a good list." she said quietly as she turned her body to face him and looked him straight in the eye, "Spike, I love you. You know that right?"

Spike inhaled deeply, "Close your eyes." When she did, he brought his demonic visage forward, "Open them, and tell me again."

Dawn opened her eyes, and just stared at him, her loving gaze never wavering, "I love you." Then she pulled him in for a passionate kiss. _'Guess seein' me like this really doesn't bother her if she can still tell me she loves me and even kiss me.' _Spike leant into it instantly, until his fangs accidentally nicked her lip and she let out a hiss. Spike pulled back, "Sorry 'bout that, luv." he said sincerely as he licked the tiny bit of her blood from his lips,_ God, she tastes amazing, better than anything I've ever tasted before._ He let his features recede to normal.

Dawn looked curiously at him, "Can you do that again?" she wondered.

He shrugged, then morphed his face again. "You've seen me like this before, pet." he reminded as she studied him closely.

"I know, but never this close." she stated, still transfixed, then she raised her hand, but stopped just before touching him, "Can I?" she asked unsure.

He nodded once, " 'Course, luv." Dawn lightly ran her fingers along the hard planes of his brow, then down his nose, all the while, Spike just watched her, loving how she was so entranced with him. He couldn't believe that she wasn't recoiling in either fear or disgust, _or both_. When he smiled at her, she brought her finger to graze the sharpness of his fangs, pressing hard enough to slice her own finger. Spike could smell her blood right away. He didn't move, but, simply watched as she smeared the intoxicating, crimson liquid on his lips. Then, he gently took her finger into his mouth and sucked until the wound closed. _Pure ambrosia, _he thought, licking the remnants from his lips.

Dawn let out a soft moan as he released her finger from his mouth. She tilted her head up and placed a soft kiss on the ridge of his forehead, then slowly kissed her way down. Right before she came to his mouth, she whispered, "I love you...all of you." she said, looking straight into his amber colored eyes.

Spike pulled back, his face returning to normal, once again. He gazed at her intensely, _He couldn't believe that this beautiful, amazing woman, could look at him, in his true face and tell him she loved him, and mean it. He had never met anyone like her in all his years that he has been in this world. What did I ever do to deserve someone like her? _

**_A/N: Ok, hope you guys liked...I am now caught up with the chapters, so from now on I will be posting updates every Friday or Saturday. I really hope you enjoy and cotinue to read, thanks._**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 9:**

"I love you...all of you." she said, looking straight into his amber colored eyes.

Spike pulled back, his face returning to normal, once again. He gazed at her intensely, _He couldn't believe that this beautiful, amazing woman, could look at him, in his true face and tell him she loved him, and mean it. He had never met anyone like her in all his years that he has been in this world. What did I ever do to deserve someone like her? _

*~*~*

As soon as she had said it again, his lips came crashing down onto hers, and Dawn felt his hardness suddenly pressing into her leg. She pushed his shoulders down, moving his body to where he was lying on his back. Then she situated herself on top of him to where she could still feel his erection pressing firmly against her backside. Spike looked at her passionately, as he entangled his hand in her hair and pulled her down to him, and began kissing her fervently. He could clearly smell the heady scent of her arousal, but, he wasn't quite sure how far she wanted to go. The need to touch her was overwhelming, but he was determined to keep his hands firmly where they were at. He didn't want to rush her into anything she wasn't ready for. If she wanted more, she would be the one to let him know.

Dawn was nervous, to say the least, she had never done this before, but she knew she was ready. She knew what she wanted, what they both wanted. She sat straight up, and raised her shirt above her head, then let it fall to the floor. This time, he didn't stop her. Instead, he lifted his mouth to her bare breast, and flicked his tongue over her hardened nipple, while he massaged the other tenderly.

When Dawn arched her back into him, he swiftly rolled them over, to where he was the one on top now. Dawn could feel every inch of him through the thin material of her shorts, and she wrapped her legs around him, pulling him harder against her. Spike could feel the heat of her arousal, even through her clothing, and groaned at the sensation, _does she have any idea what she is doin' to me?_ He dipped his head in for another fiery kiss, before moving down to her breasts, teasing her nipples between his teeth, then traveling lower. When he reached her bottoms, he placed a wet kiss on her hip bone, then tucked his fingers into her waistband and glanced up at her, making sure it was alright to continue. Dawn granted him permission by raising her hips, giving him easier access in removing them. Once he discarded them, along with her underwear, he reached his tongue out to taste her. _Every part of her tastes amazing._

Dawn jerked up, surprised by the sudden feel of his cool tongue. No one had ever seen her this exposed before, and she suddenly felt embarrassed and tensed up. Spike seemed to pick up on this right away. He lifted his head up to meet her eyes, worried that he was moving too fast, "Too much, luv? Want me to stop?" he asked concerned. Dawn took a deep breath, and shook her head, "No, keep going." This was new to her, and she was nervous, sure, but she didn't want him to stop. He lowered his head back down to her, and resumed his actions.

Soon, Spike had her nearly screaming and bucking her hips into him, as he worked his tongue expertly on her now-swollen clit, and watched her face through narrowed eyes, as her orgasm ripped through her entire body. _That's it, luv, come for me. So beautiful like this, you are._ Spike lapped tenderly at her entrance and let her juices coating his tongue, slide down his throat. He took his time savoring the taste of her and commiting it to memory, before making his way back up her body.

Dawn was still somewhat dazed, _wow...that felt...amazing...wow, _when she realized that Spike was above her, watching her intently. He smiled lovingly at her, before dropping his mouth to hers.

Dawn could taste herself on his lips, but strangely, it didn't bother her like she thought it would. Instead, she found it slightly arousing. She liked it, and deepened the kiss, much to Spike's astonishment. He wasn't sure she was going to kiss him back after he just went down on her, most girls wouldn't. But Dawn...she evidently didn't mind at all..._so bloody perfect, my girl is._

When Dawn moved her hips and began to rub herself against him, he pulled back, still looking at her like she was the most desirable and precious thing in the world, "You sure about this, luv?" Dawn didn't even hesitate, she nodded her head, "Absolutely."

Spike aligned himself at her opening and gently pushed his way inside. Dawn gasped, wincing in pain and gripping his biceps. Spike waited a moment, before easing the rest of the way into her entrance. _Christ, she's so tight. _He then stilled inside her, giving her time to adjust, and trying not to hurt her anymore than necessary. He could smell the blood from her maidenhead, assaulting his nostrils, and he struggled to reign in his demon. He slowly started moving inside her, her pain steadily subsiding and being replaced with pleasure. When the pleasure became more intense, Dawn began writhing underneath him and moving her hips in time with his. As his thrusts became faster and harder, she grasped her fingers tightly onto his shoulder blades, embedding her nails deep into his skin, causing him to bleed. Spike groaned loudly and rested his head against hers, desperately trying to keep his demon at bay, but failing miserably. _She shouldn't have to make love to a monster, but this is too much, her heat, the tightness of her core, the smell of her blood...and mine...I cant help it. _Again, Dawn didn't care, and she pulled his head down for another kiss. He didn't want to end up tearing her lips to shreds with fangs, so he broke the kiss and moved his mouth to her neck. He trailed his tongue along the column of her throat, eliciting a breathy moan from Dawn. Spike could feel her climax rapidly approaching, as well as his own. "_Spike...please...bite me_." she breathed out heavily.

Spike had wanted to, of course, but he didn't want to hurt or scare her and he would have never done that to her without her knowledge or permission, no matter how much he craved it, so he had suppressed that urge. But when she asked him to do it, he didn't hesitate. _He never was one to deny his girl anything. _He sank his fangs into her soft, delicate skin as gently as he could, and drank deeply. _I can't believe she would trust me this much to let me drink from her. _Dawn came as soon as he pierced her skin, and let out a sharp cry of both pain and pleasure, her inner walls clenching tightly around Spike's length, sending him over the edge as well. He growled as he came, shooting his cold seed deep inside her as far as it would go. He felt Dawn's body go limp under him, and he slid his fangs out of her neck carefully, lapping his tongue at the puncture wounds, then kissing them. "I love you, Dawn." Spike told her as he moved his face to hers, still keeping himself inside her as his features faded back to his human form.

Dawn gazed into his crystal blue eyes, "I love you, too."

*~*~*

It had been at least an hour and a half since they had made love, and they had spent that time just holding each other close. Spike hadn't taken his eyes off of her, since. This part was something new to him, too. Never had he gotten to bask in the afterglow, usually the women he had been with, took off right afterward, with the exception of Harmony_...he couldn't get rid of her, and he was always the one who left...couldn't stand bein' around that one. _But Dawn, he never wanted her to leave.

Dawn sighed, "I should probably go back to my room, now." She honestly didn't want to leave, but she wasn't sure if Spike wanted her to stay the rest of the night with him. She started to sit up, but Spike grabbed her hand, stopping her from getting off the bed.

"Stay." he said simply. His undead heart sank just as soon as she said those words, but when she laid back down and settled into his arms again and smiled, relief washed over him.

Spike kissed the top of her head, and they both fell into a peaceful slumber.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 10:**

Dawn awoke from Spike practically crushing her body against his chest as he slept. It made her feel so protected to be held onto so tightly in his arms. She wished she could stay like this forever...the only problem with that was, she couldn't breathe. She tried to turn to face him, but that only made his hold on her even tighter, as if he thought she was trying to get away.

Dawn elbowed him in the ribs, "Spike, wake up." ...nothing. "Spike! Wake up." she tried again, elbowing him harder.

Spike jerked, but didn't let go of her, "Huh...what...what do you want?" he slurred, still half asleep.

Dawn laughed to herself, _he's so adorable when he wakes up...oww!_ another squeeze, _stupid vampire strength, _"Spike, you're suffocating me. If you squeeze me any harder, you're gonna crack my ribs."

Spike opened his eyes and lessened his hold on her, "Mmhh, sorry 'bout that, kitten. Didn't mean to hurt you." _Didn't realize I was holding her so tight. _"Mornin'." he smiled, then leaned in to kiss her.

Dawn kissed him back and instantly, Spike was on top of her. As he kissed her, he was gradually making his way to her neck. When he came to the bite marks he left left the night before, he smiled and placed a light kiss on them. _Still can't believe she trusted me enough to let me bite her, she even asked for it. No one's ever done that for me before._ He parted her legs with his knee, and settled himself in between her thighs, gently rubbing himself up and down on her, before positioning himself at her entrance and gently started to push inside.

As soon as Dawn realized what happening, she shook her head and stopped him, "Uh uh. Stop." she said, jerking back in pain, making him look at her with a questioning expression. Dawn didn't exactly mind what he was wanting to do, but she was extremely sore from the night's activities to be able to attain any kind of pleasure. Even him barely touching her was hurting.

Spike rolled back over onto his side and propped his head on his arm, looking at her. "What's wrong, luv?" he wondered. _Please don't tell me you've changed your mind about us, pet._

Dawn felt her cheeks get heated from embarrassment, "Nothing, it's just that...umm...I'm kinda sore...down there." she answered quietly, looking down.

_God, I'm an idiot. Of course she's sore, she was a virgin. And here I am, thinkin' with my other body parts instead of my brain, causing her more pain. "Bloody hell, pet, I'm sorry. Wasn't thinkin'." he apologized._

Dawn shrugged, "It's okay," She smiled, as she moved herself on top of him and slowly crawled down his body, disappearing under the sheet, stopping when her head was right above his hardening member.

Spike kicked the sheet to the end of the bed, just in time to be able to see her grip his length in her small hand. Dawn looked up to meet his eyes, "Is this okay?" she asked nervously.

_Of course it's ok. I would be outta my bloody mind if I said no. "Only if you want to, luv." he answered. Dawn grinned, then took an experimental lick before she took the head of his penis into her mouth. Spike fought the desire to lean his head back and close his eyes, instead opted to watch her while she pleasured him. Christ, her mouth is so warm. _

Just then, the door to the basement came open. Spike was the first to hear the person approaching. He quickly looked up to see Wood descending down the stairs. Spike immediately alerted Dawn to his presence.

Dawn grabbed for the sheet to cover both herself and Spike as quick as she could.

"Well, isn't this interesting. Buffy asked me to grab some weapons from down here, and I find this." Wood commented as he glared at the two.

Spike grumbled, "You know, it's customary to knock and wait for an invite before barging in on someone." He couldn't believe he had the audacity to still enter when he could clearly see that they were engaged in a private moment.

Wood shook his head in disgust, "I don't understand how someone could degrade themselves like this." he said looking pointedly at Dawn, raking his eyes over her barely covered body.

Dawn pulled the sheet up even higher, "And I don't see how it is any of your business." she spat back at him.

Spike noticed Wood eyeing the bite marks on her neck, and put an arm around Dawn, "Get the bloody hell out of here!" he shouted.

Wood took a few more steps toward the bed, locking eyes with Dawn, "You're disgusting. You let this _vampire_ make you his whore." he said coldly.

Spike had enough at this point. No one was going to talk to his girl like that. Within half a second, Spike was out of the bed and had Wood pinned against the wall by the throat, with enough pressure to make it nearly impossible for him to breathe. "Already told you once, mate, get the hell out. I don't very much like repeating myself. You even so much as look at her again, and I'll rip your bloody throat out." he growled as he threw him into the railing of the stairs, making him fall to the ground.

Wood scrambled up to his feet, _If he honestly thinks he can threaten me like that...again, and get away with it, he's got another thing comin'. I'll make him pay for that and for what he did to my mother, and make his little bitch pay as well._ Wood thought to himself as he shot the vampire and the girl another look before leaving.

*~*~*

"That son of a bitch." Spike mumbled under his breath, while pacing furiously with clenched fists, as if looking for something to hit. He then turned to face Dawn, "Bloody wanker, comin' in like that, sayin' those things to you. You a'right, luv?" he asked softly.

Dawn nodded her head, she was mortified beyond belief, not about being with Spike, but having someone walk in on her in that kind of position, "Yeah, I'm fine. God, I must have looked like such a slut."

Spike walked over and bent down in front of her, "Hey now, don't say that. You're not, and if doesn't matter what it looked like to him. What we were doing was between me and you, and he had no right to come in and make judgments."

Dawn took a deep breath, "What if he tells Buffy?" she asked quietly. She was scared that if that happened, Spike would be mad at her. What if he doesn't want her to know about us? What if he wants it to be a secret?

Spike raised his eyebrow and shrugged, "So what? Are you embarrassed of me, pet?" He desperately hope that she wasn't. He remembered how Buffy had felt about not wanting anyone to know about him, and how bad that had hurt. He doesn't like being anyone's dirty little secret.

Dawn's eyes widened, "No, of course not. It's just I don't want you to be mad at me or anything. I figured you wouldn't want her to know." she trailed off, looking down to her hands.

_Well, that's different. Instead of her being ashamed of me, she thinks I'm ashamed of her. "Dawn, look at me. I love you, and I don't care if the whole bloody world knows it." he said as he caressed her cheek._

_*~*~*_

_Not even five minutes later, Buffy was storming into the basement. "What the hell is going on?" she asked furiously to the still naked vampire._

_"Bloody hell, does anyone knock around here?" he said looking to the sky for answers, before grabbing for his jeans, "Mind turnin' around and give a bloke some privacy?"_

_Buffy ignored his comment and marched over to Dawn, yanking her out of the bed by her arm, none to gently, _"What the hell is going on?" she repeated in anger.

"Oh, bloody hell, Slayer! What does it look like is goin' on?" Spike asked annoyed.

Buffy let go of Dawn's arm, "How could you do this to me? Either of you?" she asked looking hurt, then glancing back at Spike, "You said you loved me, but if you did, then you wouldn't have slept with my sister."

Spike shook his head and took a step closer to the slayer, "I said that a long time ago, but you were right, I don't love you. I never did, the feelings I had for you weren't real, but what I feel for Dawn is."

Buffy tightened her jaw and studied him, trying to see if he really meant what he said, "And what is that? Do you love her?" she asked in disbelief.

Spike smiled, not a smug smile, but a true smile, "Yeah, actually I do."

"No. No you don't. You're lying. You can't love her. You love me, I know you do! That's why you fought for your soul. To be a better man, for me. So that I could finally love you." she said frantically.

"Oh, come off it, Slayer. I did _not_ get my soul back for _you_. I never even tried to get the damn thing back, it was an accident. I never wanted the bloody thing in the first place. And I do love Dawn, she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. She has always accepted me for who I am, even before the soul." As much as she had hurt him in the past, and as much as he thought he hated her, he still didn't want to hurt her, but she needed to know exactly where she stood.

A tear slipped down Buffy's face as she nodded in understanding and turned to face Dawn, "I can understand how he could do this to me, but you're my sister, how could you? Were you that eager to hurt me? You knew how I felt about him, and you didn't care." she asked, feeling completely betrayed.

Dawn narrowed her eyes, "The same way you didn't care about how I felt, the entire time you were fucking him? You told me I was wrong to feel for him, to get over it, but it's ok for you to just use him? Like it didn't matter because he didn't have a soul? Is that how you justified betraying me?" Dawn asked, her voice full of anger.

Buffy crossed her arms, "So what, this is payback? I hurt you, so you hurt me? I didn't realize you actually really cared for him, I thought it was just a crush, that you would get over it."

Dawn couldn't believe this, she really didn't have any consideration for my feelings at all. "You thought wrong. An no, this isn't payback, I would never _use_ Spike like that. Yeah, I hated you for what you did, but you're still my sister and I love you and I never wanted to cause you pain."

Buffy shook her head, "Well you did. I hope you're proud of yourself. You're not my sister anymore, never really were to begin with." she said as she turned around to leave.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 11:**

As soon as Buffy had said those words, Dawn felt like she had been psychically slapped. No, not slapped...she felt like she had been punched, kicked, stabbed, and stepped on. Buffy had never before said something so hurtful, on purpose. She had always felt like she didn't matter, because she wasn't really real, and now, she felt even more like that than she had the night she found out she was just a key with fake memories. Dawn couldn't move, all she could do was stare at the closed basement door, as tears clouded her eyes until she could barely see.

Spike always knew the slayer could be a cold hearted bitch...to him, but he couldn't believe that she could be that cold and cruel to her own sister. He knew how Dawn had always felt about having fake memories and not feeling real, and for her to throw that in her face like that, was just plain wrong. Spike could easily see how hurt Dawn was from her sisters words, and he moved to stand next to her and wrapped his arms around her, "She didn't mean it, Dawn." he whispered, then kissed the top of her head. He was sure that when Buffy had calmed down, she would feel horrible about what she said, and beg Dawn to forgive her.

Dawn shook her head, "Yes, she did." Dawn gathered her clothes and got dressed. "I think I should go, Spike. Take a walk or something." Spike nodded his head in understanding. "I'll come back later...if that's alright?" she questioned.

Of course I wanted her to come back...hell, I didn't want her to leave, especially when she was this upset, but I knew that it would probably be for the best. She needed time to clear her head and think about what she wanted to do. I didn't want to cause a rift between her and her sister, but I knew that it was already made. And selfishly, I could only hope that she would still choose to be with me, even if it meant not having her sister iin her life anymore. But, if she chose her sister over me, I would understand. And I would accept it, and I would leave after this battle was over. But not before. I promised to protect her and keep her safe, and I always keep my promises...or try my best to.

I nodded my head, "Of course, luv. Come back when you're ready." As Dawn made her way up the stairs, I called out to her, "I love you, pet." Dawn stopped in her tracks and turned to me and gave me a watery smile, "I love you, too. I'll be back."

_~*~*~_

I found Buffy sitting in the shaded spot on the porch, talking quietly to Willow. Red was the first to acknowledge my presence and subtly alerted Buffy. "Well, I'm gonna go check on Kennedy, see how she is doing with the girls." Buffy quickly wiped away the few tears that had leaked from her eyes as she looked at me.

"How's Dawn?"

I raised an eyebrow at her, "How do you think she's doin', Slayer? Her own sis practacally disowned her, and brought back all of her insecurities with just a few words."

More tears fell, "Spike, I didn't mean what I said to her, I was just angry and hurt. I didn't mean it...God, I swear I didn't mean it, and I wish I could take it back."

_Least she shows remorse, "Well, she thinks you did mean it. You used the one thing that could hurt her more than anything against her. She had finally made peace with the fact that she was incorperated into everyone's memory, finally believed that she was real and that you loved her, that she was your sister, no matter what, and you took that away, with just a few small words." I know I was being harsh on her, but what she did to Dawn was even worse._

_"I'm so sorry. For everything, everything I said, the way I acted." she sobbed, "I'm sorry for what I did to you too, Spike. I know I haven't showed it, but I really am. If you can't forgive me, I understand, and I don't blame you. I don't deserve it. I know I had hurt you, and now I have hurt her, too."_

I sighed, "Don't worry about me, Slayer, I'm fine. Just worry about Dawn. She went to take a walk, find her and fix it. I love her, Buffy, and I don't want her hurting."

Buffy looked at me and gave a slight smile. There was a light in her eyes, that I hadn't seen in a long time, "You really do, don't you?" she said it more to herself than to me. "She hasn't been happy in a long time, Spike. And I think you can fix that for her, and I won't stand in either of your way." she looked down and sighed, "I had my chance, and I missed it, but now it is her chance to finally be happy. Just promise me one thing, promise me that you will take good care of her and never hurt her."

At this moment, she had earned more of my respect than I thought possible. For once, we both wanted the same thing. "Til' the end of the world." I promised again.

_~*~*~_

Buffy had went into the house to change out of her sweaty training clothes before she went out to look for her sister. She knew she had to apologize to her, and to do everything in her power to make her believe that she honestly did not mean what she had said. She would not give up until she had fixed everything that she had screwed up, and not just for what she had said earlier. Buffy knew that she had no right to feel betrayed, after all, Dawn was right. Buffy had betrayed her sister first. She had known how Dawn felt about Spike all along, and even if she believed that it had just been some silly crush that she was bound to get over eventually, it was still wrong. Buffy had never loved Spike, really, she had never even liked him. But Dawn did. He had always been there for her, he had taken care of her while she was lying in her grave, and even before that. She had always loved him, wether it was as a friend or something more, and Buffy had no right to take that away from her. If she had just taken the time and paid attention, instead of being wrapped up in her own problems, she would have seen that.

As Buffy finished changing and reached the front door, a large hand quickly covered her mouth and nose, and she slowly slipped into darkness.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 12:**

The first thing Buffy noticed when she was first coming back into consciousness was her pounding headache and the feel of cold metal tight around her wrists. At first, she thought she was dreaming, that was until she heard the clinking of chains as she tried to move. Her eyes snapped open when she heard her name being whispered. When she looked around she saw her sister tied to a chair a few feet away from her and a large bruise forming on the side of her face, along with a busted lip with dried blood on the corner of her mouth.

"Oh my God, Dawn, what happened? Are you okay?" she asked concerned as she pulled on the chains that came from the ceiling, securing her arms above her head.

Dawn looked at Buffy, "Yeah, I think so. When I coming back to the house earlier, Wood knocked me out and brought me here. I think we are in the basement of that building he tried to kill Spike in." she said looking down.

_How did she know where that place was? Buffy wondered, but decided to ignore that for the time being, "He did the same to me, where is he now?"_

_Dawn looked around, "I don't know, when he brought me in, you were already chained up, he said he would be back, then he left. I don't know where he went, but that was about, maybe, five minutes ago."_

_Buffy started pulling frantically on the chains, "Did he say anything to you? Why is he doing this?"_

_Dawn closed her eyes, "Umm...yeah. He said that I was gonna get what I deserve.." she trailed off._

"What you deserve for what?!" she asked outraged. _What could my sister of possibly done to deserve whatever Wood has planned._

"Spike." At Buffy's questioning look, she added, "I almost killed him that night that he tried to kill Spike."

Buffy's eyes widened, "What? What do you mean, 'you almost killed him'?" she asked in shock.

Dawn huffed, "I mean I almost killed him. I put a knife to him and would have slit his throat...but Spike showed up and stopped me." she practically yelled, "Then when he walked in on me and Spike this morning, he...said things to me, and told me I was disgusting and Spike threw him into the stairs and threatened him. Guess that's what he meant." she said slowly, then looked her sister in the eye, "You...I don't know why he wants to hurt you. I thought he like you." she laughed bitterly.

Buffy let everything her sister said sink in. She couldn't believe her innocent little sister could almost kill someone. _I remember when I almost killed Faith for Angel, I can understand it. She really does love him. I can't believe I never saw it before. _"I found him after Spike finished with him, and told him if he ever tried it again, I would let Spike kill him." They looked at each other in understanding and then were silent for a few moments before Buffy spoke up again, "Dawn, I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said earlier. You ARE my sister, and you always have been. I love you, and I'm so sorry. You were right before, I did know how you felt about him, I didn't know to what extent, but I did know. It was wrong for me to use him that way, and it was even more wrong to do it knowing you had feelings for him. I didn't even think about how it would hurt you, or how betrayed you would feel. All I thought about was myself, and I hope you could forgive me. I know I don't deserve it, but I promise I will do whatever it takes to earn your forgiveness." she expressed truthfully.

Dawn had tears in her eyes, she couldn't believe that her sister had actually admitted how wrong she had been, and was now asking...no, begging me to forgive her. What she had said had hurt, badly, but I do know that people tend to say things in the heat of the moment that hurt, but they don't mean and end up regretting it later. The fact that she could be so honest about how she screwed up meant so much, especially since she hardly ever admits she was wrong. Dawn swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat, "You just did. I forgive you." she smiled weakly, "What about Spike...me and Spike? I want to be with him, and I don't want to fight with you all the time."

Buffy shook her head, and at first, Dawn thought she was objecting, "I talked to Spike earlier. And I apologized to him too. I also told him that I wouldn't interfere. If you're happy, I'm happy."

Dawn let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding, "I am happy." Buffy nodded her head, "Good, I'm glad. But if he hurts you in any way, I'll end him." she added in a slightly joking manner, although Dawn knew she was _dead_ serious, _dead_ being operative word.

After their moment of understanding, Buffy tried the chains again and let out an aggravated yell, "These are too tight, and I don't have enough leverage! I had a feeling this guy was evil. What the hell is he planning to do with us?"

Dawn started to answer, only to be cut off, "I can answer that. But, it would take the mystery out, and where is the fun in that?" Wood said strolling in with an evil grin.

_~*~*~_

Angel had arrived a couple of hours ago, saying that he had something for the Slayer and that he was here to help. Always did have to be the big, strapping hero, here to save the day. This time, however, Spike didn't mind...much. He knew that they were going to need all the help they could get, and if that meant the great big poof, then so be it.

Spike looked out the window, it was already nearly sundown, and neither Dawn or Buffy were back yet. Where were they? Surely they would have been back by now, at least one of them, anyway. He didn't like the idea or Dawn being out this late on a typical Sunnydale evening, much less now, with things going the way they have been lately with The First.

Angel had been glaring at him since the moment he had arrived. Apparently, Buffy had filled him in on the little matter of his soul...along with some other things, as well.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Spike?" he finally asked, anger and confusion filling his face.

Spike raised an eyebrow, he had wondered how long it was going to take him. "What, other than having to endure your company? Absolutely nothing. But, if you like, I could make a list of what's wrong with you." he smirked.

Angel gritted his teeth and growled, "I mean it, Spike, what are you playing at? Buffy told me that you two had...some sort of...relationship," he spat bitterly, "and it ended badly, and you left to go and 'find your soul' for her, and now you're...what...sleeping with her little sister? And don't even try to deny it, I can smell her all over you." he accused.

_Not this again! How many bloody time do I have to say it?_ "First off, not that it's any of your businesses, but yeah, we did have some sort of a relationship...if you would call beating each other senseless, fucking like bunnies every night...or twice a night, a relationship..." he smirked when he heard his grand sire growl, he always loved pressing his buttons..._and knew exactly how to do it to perfection_, "but when I left, it sure as hell wasn't my soul I was after." he added sourly.

"What were you after?" Angel questioned.

"Actually, I wanted that soddin' chip outta my head, before I came back to kill the Slayer. But, it didn't quite work out that way, did it, mate?"

"So what, Spike? That didn't work out, so you decide to get your revenge by seducing her sister? Are you planning on using her just to rub it in Buffy's face? Or using her for your own personal need until you get bored and decide to break an innocent young girl's heart?" Angel looked as if he were ready to pounce at any given moment.

Spike let out a deep growl, "Neither, you git. It's not bloody like that. I would never do anything like that to her. I'm in love with her,_ Angelus,_ something you've never known the meaning of."

Angel couldn't believe what he was hearing. How could he claim to be in love with her while he's screwing her own sister? "You know there is no way she could ever love you. She would never lower herself to that, not after everything you have done...especially, once she finds out that you have been fucking her sister behind her back."

"Are you completely brain dead? I wasn't talkin' about her, you poof. I was talking about Dawn. And what we do is between me an' her, not you...or anyone else for that matter." he said solemnly. "Look, as much fun as it is to piss you off, I have more important things to do at the moment." Spike rolled his eyes as he made his way toward the front door.

Once Spike reached the end of the yard, he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, searching the air around him for Dawn's scent. His eyes snapped open as he caught a whiff of the same precious elixir he had been allowed to taste just the night before, and his eyes instantly darted to a spot in the grass, where the few drops of the crimson liquid was located. There wasn't very much at all, but there was no mistaking Dawn's blood. He would recognize that smell anywhere, especially after last night. Spike crouched down and inhaled again, looking for anything else familiar to him. He could tell that the blood had been there for at least half an hour already, along with another scent he could quickly identify.

**I know I haven't updated at all (except for last chapter) lately, I have had extreme writer's block. I think it is over with now...for the most part, lol. But if anyone has any ideas they would like to throw at me, that would be greatly appreciated. Also, what do you think Wood should have planned? I have a few ideas of where I want to go, but I would love to hear all of your opinions. If you do not feel comfortable leaving them as a review, feel free to private message me. Please tell me what you think of the story so far, reviews are loved...so please, please review. Thank you.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Warning: This chapter implies rape, and if you are not comfortable reading about it, you might want to skip this chapter.**

**Chapter 13:**

After their moment of understanding, Buffy tried the chains again and let out an aggravated yell, "These are too tight, and I don't have enough leverage! I had a feeling this guy was evil. What the hell is he planning to do with us?"

Dawn started to answer, only to be cut off, "I can answer that. But, it would take the mystery out, and where is the fun in that?" Wood said strolling in with an evil grin.

Both Buffy and Dawn's eyes quickly caught sight of the object he held in his hand. "I bet you're wondering just what this is aren't ya?" he wondered as he tossed it a few inches into the air and caught it.

"Go to hell." Dawn uttered as she rolled her eyes, seemingly uninterested. Buffy sent a glare in her direction, knowing that pissing off their capturer wouldn't go well in their favor.

Wood chuckled, "Oh no, not me. That spot is reserved for you and that soulless vampire you both care so much about."

"He's not soulless, he has a soul now." Buffy spat.

Wood looked down while nodding his head, "Oh, yeah. That's right. He does doesn't he? But that won't be an issue for much longer."

Buffy and Dawn's eyes grew wide as he held up the unknown object and started muttering words neither Buffy or Dawn recognized. The orb started glowing brightly just before Wood slammed it onto the metal table and smashed it into tiny pieces with a nearby mallet. "Like I said, the soul's no longer an issue."

* * *

"Spike! Spike! Get up. SPIKE!" Angel tried, as he swatted an unconscious Spike in the face. And just as Xander readied to pour a pitcher of ice cold water onto his face, Spike's eyes opened, much to Xander's disappointment.

Spike sat up and looked around, he was lying on the floor in the center of the Summers' living room, with Xander, Willow, Giles, and most annoyingly, Angel, all hunched over and staring at him. "Spike, what happened?" Angel demanded.

Spike thought back, he wasn't sure what was going on, one moment he was fine and the next... "_It's gone..._" Spike mumbled amazed, a slow smile creeping into his features. He couldn't believe it, he had wished for his soul to disappear since the moment he had gotten the cursed thing back, and now it seems he had finally gotten his wish.

"What's gone? Spike, what happened? You storm out of here and ten minutes later, I find you sprawled out in the grass. What happened?" Angel was starting to get irritated by this point.

Spike's eyes widened as he remembered his reason for leaving the house earlier. "Dawn." He cast a worried glance at the rest of the group, "Is she here?" he asked shakily.

Willow seemed to understand his worry. "No, neither she or Buffy have come back yet. Maybe they are still talking thing out."

Spike shook his head, "No. Robyn took her. I have to find her." he stated as he headed to the door once more.

Willow ran to the door to stop him, "Wait. Are you sure? I mean, why would he take her?" At Spike's low growl, she added, "I'll do a locator spell, it'll be faster."

Spike sighed, knowing that he only had one idea of where to look, and if she wasn't there, that it would only take that much longer to find her.

* * *

"I don't understand why you of all people would choose to side with that disgusting creature. You are supposed to be better than that, you are the slayer, but yet you protect him, and even allow your own sister to degrade herself by sleeping with that filth!" he ranted. "Her," he yelled as he pointed to Dawn, "I can understand, she is nothing but a whore!"

"She is not a whore!" Buffy screamed at him. She knew she probably shouldn't have talked back to him, seeing as he had the upper hand, but she couldn't stand the way he was talking about her sister. That, and the fact that she needed to distract him from Dawn, who was discreetly, and by the looks of it, successfully, slipping out of the knot rope that bound her hands behind her back.

Wood walked over to Dawn and grabbed a fistful of her hair, "Really? And what would you call somebody who allows herself to be fucked and fed off of willingly by a vampire?" he turned his cold eyes back to Dawn, "I'm repulsed even looking at you."

Wood bent down and retrieved a knife that hidden in his boot and smiled when he saw the fear register in her blue eyes. "Maybe I should kill you." he said with a hint of sadistic humor as he slid the knife along her throat and down her sternum.

"Get the hell away from my sister, you son of a bitch!" Buffy screeched. She hated not being able to help her sister and watching helplessly as that psychotic did god knows what to her, but she refused to give up as she again, started pulling wildly and uselessly on the chains that were securing her in place.

Ignoring Buffy's outburst, he continued traveling the knife down her chest and slit her shirt in half, down to the bottom of her bare breasts. "Or maybe, I should show you what a _human _is supposed to feel like." he commented, eyeing her hungrily.

Dawn was beyond scared at this point, she was absolutely terrified. All she could do was pray that Spike would know she was in trouble and find her before Wood had the chance to kill her..._or worse_.

Dawn screamed as she was finally free of the rope binding her hands, and kicked him as hard as she could in the groin until he doubled over in pain. Then she started working fiercely on untying the rope from around her body.

Once she was finally able to get out of the chair, Buffy yelled at her to get out of there and find help, and that she would be fine until Dawn came back. Dawn did not like the idea of leaving Buffy alone with a pissed off and out of control psycho, but didn't really see any other options. She had no clue where the keys to the handcuffs were to unlock Buffy, and knew that Wood would quickly overpower her once his pain had stopped.

As Dawn started for the door, Wood grabbed her arm and yanked her around violently as he collided his fist with her face, knocking her to the ground. "You're gonna pay for that, bitch." he yelled as he climbed on top of her.

* * *

"Bloody hell!" Spike shouted in frustration, realizing he had wasted his time with the locator spell. She had turned out to be in the same place that Spike had thought to look first.

"I'm going with you." Angel confirmed once Spike was already out the door.

"So am I." Xander added. Xander loved Dawn like a little sister and what he had learned about the way Wood had treated her, had angered him. Finding out that Spike and Dawn were together came as a complete shock to him, and although he wasn't pleased, he realized that now probably wasn't the best time to voice his opinions on the matter. Now was the time to find her and make sure her and her Buffy were safe.

Spike looked at the two, "Fine. But if he hurt her in any way, I'll kill him, and neither of you better try an' stop me, or I'll kill you too." he promised.

**A/N: Sorry it took me so long to update, I have been super busy. Not sure when the next update will be yet, but I promise, there will be another update. Please review.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 14:**

It took less than ten minutes to drive to where Wood held Dawn and Buffy captive, although for Spike it seemed to take hours. At first glance, it looked as if no on was there, but the pungent odor of fear and blood belonging to both of the Summers' women, begged to differ, and instantly, both vampires' eyes darted to the trap door leading to the basement.

Spike was already in game face as he ripped the wooden barrier completely off it's hinges and tossed it to the side. The scene he witnessed as he descended down the stairs, was enough to send him into a blind, animalistic rage.

Buffy was pulling mercilessly on the chains that confined her, with tears streaming down her face, and the look of seething hatred and disgust in her eyes, that even Spike, himself, had never even bared witness to.

And Dawn, his beautiful, amazing, full of life, Dawn, now laid bruised and battered in a bloodied heap on the ground, barely moving and almost entirely nude as blood trickled down her thighs, and she was making it a point to look at the wall and not at the man standing above her, who was pulling his pants up to his waist with a smug leer written upon his features as he landed his last kick to the side of her fragile and broken body.

Spike rushed at him at a speed that would have most likely gone unseen to the human eye, and slammed him into a wall on the furthest side of the room. In this moment, Spike could neither think nor speak, every fiber of him was consumed with anger, and he struck the other man repeatedly to his face, torso, and every other part of his body that he could manage.

Seconds later, Xander, after he was pulled out of his shocked stupor by Angel pushing past him to get to Buffy, hurried to Dawn's side.

Angel managed to rip the chains straight from the wall. Now free, Buffy started to go to Dawn, but saw Angel trying to pull Spike off of a badly beaten, and nearly unrecognizable, Wood.

Buffy put a hand to Angel's arm, "Let him go, Angel." she demanded.

"Buffy, if I let him go, he's gonna kill him." Angel tried to explain, even though he wasn't sure if Wood was going to make it either way, considering how bad of shape Spike had already put him in.

"I know." she replied as she lowered her eyes, "And he deserves it."

Angel was stunned, the only time he had ever seen her with such a disregard for a human life, no matter how despicable the human's life in question was, was when she tried to kill Faith to save him.

Spike stopped struggling in Angel's grip when he heard the Slayer's soft spoken words of admission . He thought that surely, she would be the one to try and stop him.

"Buffy, you don't mean that. He's a human, he-" Angel tried to reason, Buffy shook her head, "He's a monster. Look what he did to Dawn. He deserves to die." "Buffy, I can't just-" "You don't let Spike do it, I'll do it myself." Angel nodded in acceptance, he knew she meant it, and he could never allow her to carry something like this on her conscience. He knew that no matter how justified it felt at the time, that it would eat away at her soul for the rest of her life, and he would never let her know the burden of taking another human life.

As soon as Angel released his grip on Spike's arm, Spike stalked over to Wood and picked him up by his shirt collar and held him against the wall. "I told you I'd kill you if you ever came near Dawn again. It's poetic, innit? Knowing that you'll die by my hands, in the exact same way your mother did." Spike whispered in his ear and watched his eyes go wide, just before he snapped his neck. He dropped his lifeless body to the ground and turned to look at Buffy. A silent nod of appreciation passed between them, as he moved towards Dawn on the other side of the room.

Spike knelt down next to Dawn and stroked his fingers along the side of her face. "I'm here, luv." Dawn flinched away from him immediately, and tried to crawl as far as she could before she heaved the contents in her stomach from the day before, onto the floor. When she was done, she sat with her back against a wall and buried her head in her knees and choked back a sob.

Spike took his duster off and approached her slowly, "It's me, pet. He can't hurt you anymore." he told her softly. As he tried to reach out to her again, she jerked her head in the opposite direction, "Don't touch me!" Spike scrunched his brow together and blinked back a tear that was threatening to fall, "Dawn, I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm just gonna put this around you, a'right?" He held up his coat, offering it to her. Dawn lifted her head up and noticed Xander and Angel standing behind Spike, observing her ever move. She quickly lowered her head and wrapped her arms around her body in embarrassment.

Spike wanted to shout at them for acting like a bunch of wankers, standin' there gawkin' at her, like they would a bleedin' car accident, but not wanting to frighten Dawn any further, he kept his voice calm and even, "Give us a bit, yeah?" Once Angel and Xander were trotting back up the stairs, he looked over to the Slayer.

Buffy was still standing in the same spot she had been when he killed the principal. She was staring at nothing in particular, and her gaze seemed somewhat unfocused, as if in a trance, and Spike's mind briefly flashed back to the way she looked when Glory had taken Dawn. Spike assumed she was in shock, wether it was from Spike snapping her former boss's neck or from what she had been forced to watch him to to her sister, or from both, he wasn't sure, but now was not the time to be concerned for her. Dawn was his first priority.

Dawn looked up at him, not daring to meet his eyes, and accepted his duster and Spike helped guide it around her slender frame. "Let's get you outta here, pet." As Dawn tried to stand, she used the wall for support. When Spike reached out to steady her she shook him off, "I got it. I can do it myself." As she took a step forward, she closed her eyes and had to bite back a groan, as pain shot through her lower half.

Spike saw the pain register on her face. "Bit, I know you can do it yourself, but please just let me help you. There's no use in puttin' yourself through more pain when I'm right here." he softly tried to reason with her, he understood that she needed to feel like she was in control, but he couldn't bear to watch her go through the agony of trying to walking herself, when he could easily pick her up and carry her, and avoid adding more pain to her already abused body.

As Dawn seemed to contemplate this, her eyes wondered to the limp corpse, laying several feet away from her. He was lying motionless, with his head twisted at an awkward angle. Spike stepped in front her to block her view, "Come on, pet. You shouldn't have to see that." Dawn lowered her head, "Is he dead?" she asked uncertain, although, it was fairly obvious that he was. Spike recognized her need for confirmation and nodded his head, "Yeah, luv, he's dead. I killed him, won't ever be able to hurt you again." As tears slipped down her bruised cheeks, Dawn leaned in to him and Spike swiftly scooped her into his arms, and she buried her head in his chest, as he carried her up the stairs.

**A/N: Please, please, please review! I would really love to know what ya'll think. Also, reviews help inspire me to write faster. No flames please, but constructive criticism is very much appreciated. It's not hard, you don't even have to log in, just click review and tell me what you think. Thanks.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Ok, here is the long awaited update. I'm sorry about the wait. Remember to please review. Also, sorry in advance, but my spell check isn't working for some reason and I can't figure out how to fix it, so if my spelling is off, that's why. Also...the page breaks were not working...I don't think, so when i seems like it should be a new scene...yea...you get the idea, lol.  
**

**Chapter 15:**

Once Spike had settled into the backseat of Angel's Plymouth, with Dawn laid across his lap, Buffy slid in beside him. As Angel pulled onto the main road, headed toward Buffy's house, Xander turned to look Dawn over, "Shouldn't we get her to the hospital?"

Spike felt Dawn instantly tense in his arms as her head shot forward in Xander's direction, "No! I'm not going to the hospital." she breathed out shakily.

Xander looked towards Buffy to back him up, but she was being oddly quiet and appeared to be lost in her own thoughts. "Dawn, you look pretty bad, you should really see a doctor." he stated slowly.

"No."

"Dawn..."

"Xander, just drop it! I said, I'm not going. Please, just...stop." she sighed frustrated, as tears leaked from her eyes. Spike lightly brushed his thumb over her arm in a comforting gesture as she buried her head back into his chest.

Xander nodded reluctantly and turned back towards the front.

As soon as they pulled into the driveway of the Summer's residence, Dawn remembered that there was a house full of girls she barely knew, "I don't want to go in there." Angel gave her a questioning glance as he lifted his seat forward to make room for them to be able to get out. "There is too many people in there, I just...I don't want..."

Angel seemed to understand her hesitation, "I have a room at the Sunnydale Inn, it's yours if you want it. You and Buffy," Angel raised his eyes to meet Spike's, "or whoever you want to stay with you."

Dawn tried for a slight smile, instead, coming out as a grimace as she shifted to sit up, and shook her head in acceptance, "Thank you."

Spike looked over to Buffy, who still seemed oblivious to what was going on, "Slayer, you stayin' here, or are you comin' to the motel with us?"

When she didn't answer for a few seconds, Spike nudged her in the arm with his elbow, "Huh? Oh, umm, yeah, I'm coming."

Spike looked at her skeptically, briefly wondering if she would be alright, before turning his gaze to Angel, who seemed concerned for her as well. "Right, well why don't you go grab some of the Bit's clothes, and maybe a first aid kit, yeah?" Buffy nodded and exited the car with Xander following behind.

Spike kept his eyes on Dawn as they made their way to the motel. He wasn't sure if she had just fallen asleep or passed out from the pain. Either way he was partly grateful as he took this time to observe her injuries on her head, being as careful as he could as not to wake her. He didn't get a very thorough look since blood stained her skin around the wounds, but as far as he could tell they didn't seem too bad..._the ones on her head, anyway. _

Once they arrived and pulled into the parking lot, Buffy started to open the door to get out, when Angel stopped her, "Can we talk for a minute?" When she agreed, Angel handed Spike the motel key and told him the room number and asked if he could take her by himself for a few minutes.

Spike lifted Dawn easily and hurried to the room without waking her, and once he had gotten inside he gently laid her down on the bed.

He cautiously opened his duster to get a better look at the extent of her injuries, and had to blink back tears as he again saw the blood coating her inner thighs. _If only I had killed that bastard before, this wouldn't have happened to her. She wouldn't have had to go through this, that son of a bitch never would have been able to touch her, never been able to... _Spike let out a low growl as he envisaged _exactly _what had happened to her. He shook the image from his head as he slowly closed the duster and covered her back up.

"Buffy, are you alright?" Angel asked as he sat in the parking lot with Buffy.

She shook her head as she answered, "Yeah, I'm fine. Just worried about Dawn."

Angel considered her for a moment, he didn't understand what had happened. He could piece together _what _had happened to Dawn by the condition she was in when they found her, not to mention, he could _smell_ what happened to her, but the reason why was still a mystery. Angel didn't know much about this guy, but from what he had been told over the phone by Buffy, he was one of the good guys, son of a slayer, granted, Spike was the one who killed his mother, and no doubt he had issues with Spike, but what did that have to do with Buffy and Dawn? Why had he tried to hurt them?

"What is going on, what happened back there, Buffy?"

Buffy closed her eyes as the tears she had been holding in, spilt down her face. "I don't know. He just snapped, I guess. He hurt her, Angel! I tried, I did, I tried to stop him, but I couldn't! God...how could I have let this happen to her?" she cried hysterically.

Angel reached out and put his arms around her, "Hey, Buffy, listen to me, this isn't your fault. I know if you could have stopped it, you would have. Dawn knows that too."

As Buffy started to quiet down, Angel's cell phone rang, "Here, you take it, it's Willow, I'm gonna go and get another room."

Spike was tenderly caressing the side of Dawn's face as he watched her sleep, when he heard the light rapping at the door. Spike opened the door and motioned for Buffy to step inside.

Buffy set a medium sized duffel bag down on the table, "These are her clothes and a toothbrush, along with some first aid stuff...bandages and antiseptic." Spike nodded his thanks and unzipped the bag and pulled out the medical supplies. "Umm, Angel is in the next room over, he is going to stay in there...it has two beds, you can stay in there if you want to."

Spike looked at her sharply, "I'm not leavin' 'er side, Slayer." _Just look at what happened the last time I did that. _

Buffy sighed, "Okay. Should I...um, should I wake her up to...clean her?" she asked gesturing to the medical supplies.

Spike shook his head, "No, I'll do it...after she wakes up. Just let her sleep for a while. Look, why don't you go and stay in Angel's room? There is only one bed here and you should probably get some rest."

Buffy narrowed her eyes and studied his face for a long moment, "Can I trust you?"

Spike threw his hands up, "Bloody hell, Slayer, we're back to that? Thought we had this conversation earlier. Told you I would never hurt her."

Buffy steeled her gaze at him, "You did, but that was before."

"B'fore what? B'fore that son of a bitch ra-...before he hurt her?" he asked incredulously.

She squeezed her eyes shut for a brief second as she tried to push the events of what had transpired tonight out of her mind. "No. Before you lost your soul again."

Spike stood dumbfounded for an instant, _How did she know about my soul bein' gone? Unless...ahh, apparently _he _had somethin' to do with that, as well. _"Nothin's changed, Slayer."

"How do I know that? You don't have a soul or a chip anymore, how do I know that-"

"Listen, Slayer," he interrupted, "Told you I would never hurt her, and I meant it, me not havin' a soul doesn't change that. I'm not like 'Peaches', who instantly goes insane and starts murdering the people he claims to care about." Spike could see that she still wasn't convinced, "Look, even when I had that soddin' chip and before the soul, I never hurt her...and I could have. The chip didn't work on her, guessin' 'cause she's not entirely human...found that out by accident. She knows that, too, she also knows I would never harm her." he added quietly.

Buffy gaped at Spike, she couldn't believe that he had been able to hurt her sister the entire. _Well, maybe I should trust him, he did, after all, save her life numerous times, and he took care of her and watched out for her the summer I was gone, knowing the whole time that he could harm her if he chose to. But he didn't, not once. He even let a hell god torture him nearly to death, and still never gave her up. _"Okay, just please, don't give me any reason to regret my decision of trusting you with her."

"Wouldn't dream of it, Slayer." he said as she exited the room.

**Again, please review. It really inspires me and it also just makes my day. Thank you to all of you who are reading and patiently waiting for my updates. Anyways, tell me what you think and please be honest...not brutal, lol. And, if you have any ideas or anything you would like to see happen, please feel free to let me know. **


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 16:**

Not too long after Buffy had left, he heard Dawn whimper in her sleep. Spike lightly tried to shake her to wake her up, but that only made her whimper more. Spike leaned over her and called her name quietly as he shook her harder.

Dawn woke with a terrified scream and began hitting at Spike's chest, trying to push him away from her.

"Stop it! Get off of me!" she wailed with tears leaking from her closed eyes, as she raised her hand to his face and scratched him hard with her nails, in her effort to get away from him.

Spike gripped her hands in his, "Dawn, luv, open your eyes. It's me, kitten, shhh. It's a'right now." As Dawn opened her eyes, and took in her surroundings, she relaxed into Spike's arms and tried to calm herself.

Dawn pulled back and to look at Spike and saw that he had several scratches running along the side of his face, with blood welling to the surface, and instant felt guilty, "I'm sorry about your face."

Spike reached his hand to his cheek to wipe the small amount of blood, and offered her a slight smile, "It's fine, pet, don't worry about that. How are you feeling?"

She took in a deep breath, wincing slightly from the pain in her ribs, and nodded, "I'm fine." she lied

Spike looked at her disbelievingly, "Don't lie to me, pet. You're not fine. How are you really feeling?" he asked softly.

Dawn squeezed her eyes shut, then looked down, "Dirty. I have to take a shower." she answered, barely above a whisper and moved her legs slowly to the side of the bed, to prepare to stand.

Spike followed her soundlessly to the mirror above the sink, that was connected to the bathroom. With each move she made, he could see the pain in her eyes that she was desperately trying to cover up. He moved in front of her and raised his hands to his duster, "Let me help you?" At her nod of approval, he carefully removed his coat from her body, and had to swallow back the bile threatening to rise in the back of his throat, as he once again took in the sight of her injuries.

In embarrassment, Dawn tried to raise her arms to cover herself, and let out a sharp gasp, as the pain in her left arm shot through her body. Her right arm immediately reached out to try and stop the pain, and Spike's eyes grew wide as he observed, for the first time, the swollen bulge at her shoulder. _'_

_Christ! How did I not see this earlier? I knew she was in a lot more pain than she was letting on, but bloody hell, this must be unbearable for her.'_ He wasn't sure how he had been able to overlook the fact that her shoulder had been dislocated, or how she had managed to conceal this degree of pain from him.

"Come lay down on the bed. Your shoulder is out of the socket, an' I've got ta put it back in. A'right, pet?" Dawn swallowed hard and let Spike guide her to the bed.

Dawn knew that the pain she felt in her shoulder was nothing compared to the pain she would feel when Spike pops it back into place. She remembered back to when her mother had been in the hospital, and she had wandered into the emergency room, as a man who looked to be in his mid to late thirties, had sustained this injury, and how she had nearly passed out as the man screamed when the doctors relocated it.

"This is gonna hurt, luv, but I need you to lay on your back and try not to move. Can you do that?" Dawn nodded her head and grabbed a pillow and placed it to her mouth and bit down. "I'll be fast, pet, then you won't be in nearly as much pain."

Spike knew exactly what kind of pain this was causing her, seeing as how his own shoulder had been dislocated on several occasions. He hated knowing that he was about to cause her even more pain, but he positioned himself, straddling her waist in attempt to hold her still, as he bent her arm and rotated her shoulder, pulling it out even further, before relocating it.

He blinked back the tears in his eyes as she screamed into the pillow, then moved to the floor and knelt down level to her head. "You a'right?"

Dawn sucked in a deep breath and wiped the tears off her face, as more fell down, "Yeah, it feels better," she sniffled, "thank you."

Spike nodded, then asked quietly "Do you want to tell me what happened?"

Dawn hesitated for a brief second before answering, "Umm, he had me tied to a chair, and, I, umm, got out of it and tried to run," she closed her eyes and took another deep breath before continuing, "and he...he grabbed my arm and...pulled me back...right before he..." she broke off with a strangled sob.

Spike gritted his teeth as he pictured what Dawn had told him, and had to remind himself that the son of a bitch who did this to her, was dead by his own hands, and would never be able to hurt her again. He reached his arms out to comfort her, but she shook her head, "I can't..." she cried and clamped her hand over her mouth, and ran as quickly as she could to the bathroom toilet.

Spike followed in suit, and held her hair out of her face as she dry heaved into the toilet, then laid her head on her arm, on top of the seat. "I'm sorry, Spike."

Spike looked at her in shock, "What? What the bloody hell are you sorry for?"

Dawn sniffled as the tears started pouring down, "Everything. For letting him do this to me...I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" she wept hysterically.

Spike shook his head, he couldn't believe she thought this was in any way her fault. _'The only one to blame is that bastard...and me for not killin' 'im when I should've.'_

"Dawn, luv, look at me. Do not be sorry! This is not your fault. Not at all. You didn't _let_ him do anything to you. He...he forced himself on you...you didn't let him. You did nothing wrong...do not be sorry for him. You got that, pet?" he told her in a firm, but gentle voice.

Dawn nodded her head once, before getting up, "I have to get a shower."

Spike stood up as well, and walked over to the tub and turned the faucet on, "Would you like me to help you?"

"No, I got it. I just want to be alone for a little bit, please."

"A'right, you need anything, just call me, and I'll be right here."

Spike watched Dawn nod once and give him a small smile, before shutting the door. He sighed deeply, then let the tears he had been trying to hold back, finally fall.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 17:**

Spike glanced at the clock on the bedside table again, for what felt like the hundredth time. It had been nearly forty-five minutes since Dawn had gone into the bathroom to take her shower, and Spike could hear her crying quietly through the door. Deciding to go check on her to make sure she was alright, Spike grabbed a pair of cotton underwear and a long t-shirt from the overnight bag Buffy had packed, and gently tapped on the door.

"Dawn? Luv, can I come in?" Spike asked and waited for her answer. After several seconds of not receiving an answer, Spike turned the doorknob and walked over to the shower and slowly pulled open the curtain.

Dawn was sitting on the floor of the shower with her legs pulled to her chest, and her chin resting on top of her knees, as the water poured over her body. Spike noticed that she was shaking, and at first thought it was from her crying. When he reached in to turn the water off, he realized that it was ice cold, and that Dawn was freezing.

"Christ, kitten, you're freezing." He hurriedly wrapped a towel around her body and lifted her out of the shower, and sat her down on the toilet seat and carefully dried most of her body.

Looking her over once more, he saw that there wasn't much that needed to be bandaged. The shower had washed away the blood on her head, leaving a small cut that was almost closed already, and aside from her busted lip, the injuries on her body were mostly deep bruises, that were already becoming dark.

Spike bit the inside of his cheek to keep from growling as he spotted the bruises in the shape of hand prints on the inside of her thighs, _Should have made the bastard's death last a lot longer than I did. _

He focused his attention back to her face and lightly brushed his fingers along the other bruise on her cheek. Dawn caught his hand with her own and leant into him, "Thank you." she whispered, tears spilling down her face and onto Spike's hand.

Cocking his head to the side and offering a small ghost of a smile, he asked just as quietly, "For what?"

Dawn took a deep breath and exhaled before answering, "For everything. Being here...taking care of me." Dawn looked up to meet his eyes, "For saving me."

The corner of Spike mouth twisted up into a grimace of self-disgust and he shook his head, "No, don't. Don't thank me for that. I didn't save you, it was because of me that he hurt you at all. And I didn't get there in time to stop him...and I'm sorry, Dawn. I'm so sorry...I should have...done something before...I should have know he would try to hurt you...'s my fault. "

"No." Dawn gathered both of his hands in hers and squeezed and hard as she could, "Earlier you told me that what happened wasn't my fault, well, it wasn't yours either." She reached out and wiped the few tears that were falling freely, away from his face. The only time Dawn had ever seen Spike cry was when Buffy had died, and now he was crying over her...because of what happened to her. She couldn't believe he thought it was his fault. "You did save me, Spike. If you hadn't of come...he was going to kill me! You stopped him...so, thank you."

Not wanting to argue with her or upset her further, he simply nodded his head in agreement. He knew he didn't deserve her thanks or gratitude, he still believed that he was responsible in some way for everything that had happened to Dawn that night, and her saying different, wasn't going to convince him otherwise. He hated himself for not killing the son of a bitch when he had the chance.

X X X X X X X

Nearly two hours later, Dawn was curled up to Spike's side asleep, thanks to the pain killers Buffy had thought to throw in with the medical supplies. Spike kissed the dried tear tracks on Dawn's cheek before carefully maneuvering his way out of the bed without waking her, before grabbing his duster and silently making his way out of the room. Once he was safely outside the motel, he leant his back against the brick wall and reached into his pocket, taking out a cigarette and lighting it.

As hard as he tried, he still couldn't shake the image of the way he had found Dawn, with Wood standing over her, pulling up his pants, from his mind. Feeling his eyes start to water, and the rage returning to the surface, he instantly vamped out and shook his head, trying to rid himself of the memory. Hearing a door open, he turned his head to the side and saw Angel coming out of the next room over.

Angel greeted Spike and came to stand next to him, "Mind if I have one of those?" he wonder, gesturing to the cigarette.

Spike arched an eyebrow and looked at him questioningly, "Usually it Angelus who does the smoking, since when do you?"

Angel took the cigarette from the pack Spike help out, and lit it, "Since tonight. Buffy's a mess over what happened tonight. She finally fell asleep. How's Dawn doing?"

Spike took a long drag before answering, "She was just raped tonight. You've caused this kind of damage enough in the past, how the bloody hell do you think she's doing?"

Angel's face twisted in pain as he remembered his countless victims, "That was Angelus, not me."

"Right." Spike laughed bitterly, "You forget you're talking to someone who's both had a soul and been without. It's still you, no matter which way you try an' spin it...you'd just like to believe differently." Spike looked Angel in the eye, "The wouldn't feel the guilt so heavily if it wasn't really you."

Knowing it was the truth, Angel looked to the ground and decided now would be a great time to change the subject, "Speaking of...Buffy told me that your soul was taken away from you."

"Yeah." Spike swallowed hard, he couldn't believe he had been happy about losing his soul. Now knowing how it had happened, he could never think of it as a good thing. Not when it was the same monster who had hurt his Dawn. "What of it?"

After taking a long, hard look at Spike, Angel spoke, "Earlier you told me that you never wanted the soul, that you wanted the chip out so that you could come back and kill Buffy..."

"Not just her. Her friends too. Coulda killed her even with the chip." Spike interrupted.

Angel let out a growl, "Right. Well now the chip's out and your soul is gone. And I won't let hurt her...or any of them."

Spike rested his head against the wall and closing his eyes, he let out a deep sigh. "Don't care 'bout that anymore. I'm not planning on hurtin' the Scoobies...just plannin' on makin' sure Dawn gets through this."

"You still love her?" Angel asked after a moment of brief consideration.

"More than anything."

_**I know it's been a long time, but please review & let me know you are still interested. Thanks.**_


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